Robotics
by Laura2
Summary: My version of Intervention and how I thought things would go with the Buffybot&Spike.This was written before the episode ever aired, by the way.Spoilers up to that ep.and please R&R!Part 2 is up, but not finished,so you can read it but there is no end yet
1. Part 1

It was midnight, and all was eerily dark and silent in the graveyard. The only sound was the shuffling of feet as a very anxious, greasy sort of man walked nervously along the path to the crypt he was instructed to. He had by the hand a young, pretty, blonde girl, and the graveyard looked like the last place she belonged. Neither said anything as they trudged along. A vampire, with his human face on came out of the shadows into the man's face. The man jumped back in surprise and horror, and screamed like a little girl. The young woman didn't even flinch.  
  
"Shut up!" Our favorite peroxide demon whispered harshly at the man. "Do you want the whole bloody world to wake up?!"   
  
"Hey, hey, sorry man, I-I-just..." the greasy guy stuttered uncontrollably. He was obviously terrified. "I just don't see why I couldn't of delivered her when it was light out, or-"   
  
"What, afraid of the dark?" Spike teased. Then, in a more serious tone he said, "Never mind that. Mind your own business; all that matters is that you did exactly what you were told you, understand?"   
  
The man gulped and nodded nervously. He didn't pry any further into the unusual time and place of the meeting.  
  
"So..." Spike smiled with an evil glint in his eyes. "This is her, huh? Not too bad...not bad at all...looks just like her..." He walked around her examining her from all sides.   
The girl didn't move a muscle, just looked straight ahead with no emotion, and not even a blink of the eye. Spike looked at the man satisfied. The guy jumped, remembering something and said "Warren said to give you these too..."he handed Spike a black sack. When Spike took it he almost dropped it from the weight.  
  
"What the bloody hell is in here, bricks?!"  
  
"N-No..." the man squeaked. "An instruction manual...and I think they're might be a remote control too..." Spike stared at the man for a moment to see if he was kidding, but then, seeing he was not, shrugged. "Technology these days...never stops amazing me..." he grabbed the girl roughly by the arm and half dragged her into the crypt. "Tell Warren I appreciate his services." And with that he shut the door in the man's face. The guy stood there for a moment, seeing if he was going to come back out, and then with a shiver and a "Warren, you owe me..." he ran as fast as he could out of the graveyard.  
  
Inside the crypt, Spike opened the sack and took the two objects out. The first was a remote control that had a bunch of buttons on it. One said on/off, and another said battery recharge. There were many more with words on them like do this, do that, make dinner, clean dishes and so on. There was one that said "growl" and he smiled at that. "This is going to be fun..." he thought, for he could just imagine Buffy Summers, the slayer, growling.   
The second object was the instruction manual. It seemed to weigh a ton, and it was very thick. Spike didn't see how there could be so many pages; since the words were so small they were hardly readable.   
  
"Instruction Manual  
A. Set up  
1. Name  
a. Click the set up button...  
b. Click on button and say chosen name....  
c. Something.... click...something else...Ugh!"   
  
Spike squinted and threw the book at the wall numerous times in his frustration, but eventually made it all out. Five hours later, that is.  
"Now..." Spike said, weary from all the hard work. "Tell me who you are."   
"My name is Buffy Anne Summers. I am 20 years old and was born in 1981. I am the Slayer. I have a boyfriend. You are my boyfriend. I am perfect."  
Spike chuckled and closed the heavy manual finally, relieved to be done. "That you are, love. That you are..." he reached out for her and she came to him. "Now, lets go have some fun."  
  
*******  
  
"...You see, even Anya knows how to use the Internet. She has her own Website! Trust me, Xander. If she can do it ANY body can!" Willow remarked as Xander, Anya, and herself walked down Main Street. It was 6:00 and already dark so not too many people were out besides them.  
  
"Okay Willow, again, it's not that I couldn't use the Internet if I wanted to, it's just -"  
  
"Don't worry," Willow interrupted Xander happily, ignoring everything he had said. "I'll come over and help you. Trust me, by the time I'm through with you you'll be a complete Internet freak!"  
  
Xander shook his head, giving up, and Anya murmured under her breath "What, like you?"  
  
"Wait a minute..." Xander started in an annoyed tone, "Was that Buffy I just saw turn that corner?"  
  
"I thought she said she couldn't come tonight?" Anya said in a confused tone.  
  
"She did." Willow said, sounding hurt. "She has a test to study for and then she's going patrolling. At least, that's what she told me. But why would she lie?"  
  
Xander fumed angrily "Because. She's with some guy!"  
  
"What?!" Willow stared at Xander surprised.  
  
"Well, good." Anya said, putting on her well-to-do mood. " 'Bout time she got over that Riley Finn."  
  
"Yes, but why lie?"  
  
"I don't know, Will," A furious Xander replied. "But something about this guy seems all to familiar."  
  
Spike and his Buffy-bot walked up Main Street in front of the Scoobies with a decidedly confident air. Spike made sure to walk slowly enough so that Xander and the others could just make them out in the block ahead of them. Xander then started to walk hurriedly in quick strides, and Anya and Willow had to practically run to keep up with him. When he got up to Spike he shoved him hard, so that Spike jerked forward very suddenly, but fortunately for him, didn't fall. Spike turned to face them all and finally the two girls realized it was he.   
  
"Ah-ha!"   
  
Xander said it like they were in one of those old murder mystery movies, and he had just figured out "who-done- it." Spike started to laugh like he would never stop, which only got Xander angrier.   
  
"I don't see what's so funny, Spike." He said harshly. He started clenching and unclenching the fists at his sides.  
  
"Buffy..." Willow said the robot. "Why...how...why Spike?!"   
  
"Buffy" just stared up at her blankly and then turned to Spike. "Sweetie, who are these people?"  
  
Spike smiled wickedly them. "I don't know. Never saw any of the bloody lot in my life."   
  
"Spike!" Xander shouted angrily and shoved Spike against the wall, holding him by the throat. "What the hell did you do to her?!" Before Spike could answer, "Buffy" pulled Xander off of him so that she now had him against the wall by the throat. "How dare you try to hurt my boyfriend!" She screamed at him. "Buffy!" Spike shouted, knowing all to well that she, not being the real Buffy, would kill him in an instant. He remembered all too well being thrown out the window by Warren's last creation, and it had been with great ease. This one could probably kill any human being in a manner of minutes.  
  
"Buffy, leave him. Come on, let go."  
  
"Yes, darling."  
  
She let go of him, which resulted in him falling to the floor coughing. Anya and Willow ran over to him and helped him up. Spike and his robot left.  
  
*******  
  
That night he lied down on his couch that also served him as a bed and dozed off, dreaming of what happy fun the 'morrow would bring. "Buffy" sat and watched him, not moving an inch as she had been instructed. But then he turned over in his sleep right on to the remote control, pressing many unknown buttons. Then the remote fell to the floor. The Buffybot picked up the remote control and smashed it, then put the remains under the couch. She then slipped silently out into the graveyard. It was midnight. Spike was still sound asleep.  
  
TO BE CONTINUED  



	2. Part 2

"Ahhhhh," Spike yawned. He stretched and looked around sleepily. Small TV in front of him, old ragged couch and chair in there place.yes, everything was just like it was supposed to be. Everything.Perfect.Then his still half asleep eyes rested on the empty seat beside him, and after a second of recognition, he jumped up, now fully awake.  
  
"Shit!" he cursed, "Where could it have gone?! I could have sworn I said for her to stay right there-"  
  
"CREEK!" The open door swung freely. That's when the truth dawned on him. The Buffybot was gone.  
  
He paced back and forth quickly, imagining all the things that could of gone wrong, and all the havoc she could now spread, lost as she was. Not to mention, trying to clear his mind and think of what to do next. Then he remembered, the remote! Of course! He looked in every inch of his home, but there weren't too many places it could be. He looked under the tv, on the couch, in between cushions, even in his little hidden place under his home, beneath the trap door. Finally, he found it, or I should say what remained of it, for the smashed remote was sprawled everywhere under the couch. He looked at his watch. Three hours until sun rise. That's how long he would have to search for her. It wasn't much time.  
  
Taking big strides, he marched out the door.  
  
Meanwhile, our favorite vampire slayer was doing her daily-before-bedtime patrol. It was an unusually boring patrol, too. "*Sigh* Where's the action?? This is soooo boring, I wish there was at least some vamps out for me to dust... just to give me something to do...keep me busy...get my adrenaline running..." She thought this way to herself for an hour and a half. When still no vamps showed up, she decided she might as well go home. Just when she was about to turn in the direction of home, she heard a rustling in the bushes. "Oh, of course, now they decide to show up." She thought to herself, annoyed at the nerve of the creatures of darkness. Would it kill them to be punctual for once?  
  
She turned and walked closer to the bushes. Oddly, although she was certain someone, or something was nearby, there seemed nothing vampire-like about it. For one, she didn't have that slayer feeling she always had when one was around, and also, vampires almost always just came out and attacked her, or tried to run away, when they knew they were caught, but not just stand there. She took a couple more steps, and was only a few strides away from the bushes when she heard someone call her name from behind her.  
  
"Buffy?...Buffy??...Buffy!" Spike shouted, desperate to find the robot before someone discovered it.  
  
"What?!" An irritated Buffy asked while turning to face him.  
  
The Buffybot turned around, also, to face him from behind the bush.  
  
Spike stood there with his mouth open a second, completely bewildered and not knowing what to say, just knowing that if the slayer turned her head at that very moment she would be face to face with the 'Bot, and it would be the end of Spike for sure!  
  
"Uh, um, B-Buffy? I, I, saw some vamps down that way,"(he pointed in the direction behind him,) "and there seems to be a whole mess of them, and-"  
  
  
  
She looked at him suspiciously. "A-And you a-are stuttering because...?" She mocked.  
  
"Look!" he said, finally getting back to his old self, agitated by her little comment, "Countless. Vampires." (Pause)"Need. Slaying." (Pause) "Do you want me to spell it out for you???"  
  
She crossed her arms and gave him one of those looks. "Fine."  
  
"V-A-M-P--"  
  
"No!! I mean fine, which way are the vampires?? I might as well stake something if it can't be you."  
  
He was tempted to tell her to take her best shot, but then he remembered the robot, which he amazingly had forgotten about, and bit his tongue.  
  
She left. Once she was far enough away he let out a sigh of relief.  
  
The robot, following, started a confident walk behind Buffy in identical paces. Buffy, hearing someone walk behind her, turned around. Completely caught of guard, jumped in between them, blocking Robo-Buffy from the real Buffy's view.  
  
She looked at him questioningly. He, not knowing what else to do, shrugged and looked away. So Buffy slowly turned around and continued her walk. "That vampire's getting stranger and stranger." She thought. "No point trying to figure him out now. There's slaying to be done!" She thought in mock enthusiasm.  
  
She continued on her way. When Buffybot tried to push Spike aside and follow her, Spike grabbed her and put his hand around it's mouth so it couldn't scream, and jumped behind a near by bush with it.  
  
When Buffy was far enough away he yelled frustrated, "What's wrong with you?! You're mine, you hear?! You're supposed to do what I tell you to, and nothing but! What the hell-"  
  
Spike was cut off by the buffybot trying to run away again. He tried to grab her by the arm and roughly pull her down again, but she had her robo- strength, and managed to get away.  
  
"Oh!" Spike said frustrated beyond means, "Bloody great. Just bloody great!!"  
  
*******  
  
TO BE CONTINUED 


End file.
